LOUIS WALSH IS A TIT
News reaches us that Strictly Come Dancing trounced The X-Factor in Saturday night's ratings, and to be perfectly honest, we're not surprised. We sat down to watch it, and we lasted all of about five minutes before turning over to BBC One. Why? Because Louis Walsh is simply unbearable.
We honestly didn't think that Louis would be the X-Factor judge we'd hate most. After all, Simon Cowell is easy to hate because he's such a pantomime villain, and everyone's eyes and ears would be better off if Sharon Osbourne had practised birth control. The offences of Osbourne and Cowell, however, are but a drop in the bucket to those of Walsh.
Does he really think that all those spiteful little asides he makes about Simon's bands make him look clever? All those snide comments about how at least he won't make any of his acts sing 'Unchained Melody'? Louis: remember, you're responsible for foisting Westlife on the public, you are every bit as much to blame as Simon is for the atrocity that is Allow Us To Be Frank. Also: please knock it off with all this I-care-about-my-acts schtick - you dumped Girls Aloud onto the hands of whoever would take them as soon as the cameras stopped rolling on Popstars Colon The Rivals, and any success they have achieved since then has been in spite of you, not because of you. Also, again: if you care about your acts so much, please explain to us why Samantha Mumba is sitting at home looking forlorn and waiting for the phone to ring?
Our e-mail address is in the sidebar if you'd like to get in touch, Louis. In the meantime, we'll be backing Cassie and Rowetta, if only to get your smug face off our screens as quickly as possible.
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